Roger Creager Lyrics
"The Everclear Song"

Every day at lunch in high school and all my senior year
I'd drink my coca-cola with a touch of Everclear
I never had to study math, science, or history
I'd have a chemical flash back to jog my memory

My junior year I swore I loved sweet Miss Sherri Ann
One night I put some Everclear in her Dr. Pepper can
Well I thought it'd make her easy
But she took it pretty hard
I took her home and rang her doorbell,
Left her layin' in the yard.

Chorus:
Tequila dries me out
Beer just makes me fat
Whiskey makes me nauseous,
Now tell me who the hell needs that.
So if youre thinking about drinking
Well the answers crystal clear
It's the invisible intoxicant
It's called Everclear.

I remember my church picnic
In the spring of '89.
Yeah they had four fresh watermelons
Sliced right off the vine.
When they bowed their heads giving grace for the food,
Hey I pulled out my bottle and I soaked them melons good.
Well they never knew what hit em
When that potion went to work.
They had grandmas doing back flips
Grandpas looking up their skirts
They were singing hallelujah and Willie Nelson songs.
Preacher said it was the best dang picnic
That the Baptists had ever thrown.

Chorus
Tequila dries me out
Beer just makes me fat
Whiskey makes me nauseous,
Now tell me who the hell needs that.
So if youre thinking about drinking
Well the answers crystal clear
It's the invisible, intoxicant
It's called Everclear.

When I'm drinking Everclear
I think I'm king of this whole world
I'm bigger and badder than John Wayne,
And cooler than Steve Earl.
Until I wake up and I'm face down in the hall
Hey I'm completely naked for a reason I can't recall.
Well I'm kinda sorta thinking that maybe I met chick
Cause there's perfume in the air
And there's lipstick on my neck.
Well I hope that she was pretty,
And I hope that she was kind...
Enough to leave my clothes somewhere
They're easy to find.

Chorus
Tequila dries me out
Beer just makes me fat
Whiskey makes me nauseous
Now tell me who the hell needs that
So if youre thinking about drinking
Well the answers crystal clear
It's the invisible, intoxicant
It's called Everclear.