Richard Thompson Lyrics
"Psycho Street"

A man sits down to write a letter but instead he writes a book
The book begins, "Dear sir, I don't know if you're interested
But your wife is a whore"

A man gets on a train and proceeds to take all his clothes off
He begins to play with himself and he says
"In my country, this is definitely not offensive"

A man pours petrol through his neighbor's letterbox
And throws in a match, the house is engulfed in flames, as the neighbors
Jump from the upstairs window he films the whole thing on video
He plays it back to them later in hospital
"Things have been pretty dull at home without you", he says

A man pushes a lawnmower two hundred miles on his knees
To the tomb of the unknown gardener, "Great one", he cries
"I have done my penance, I bring my offering
Grant me, grant me, grant me pest-free roses"

Psycho street, friendly people down on psycho street
Good neighbors down on psycho street
Well if you need a hand, need a friend, we understand
And if you need a pal, we'll be there, any how

Psycho street
Psycho street
Psycho street

A man stakes his neighbor's cat to the barbecue and turns on the gas
"Now are you going to talk" he says "Or am I going to have to get nasty"

A man has an inflatable doll made that looks exactly like his wife
He murders his wife, dissolves her body in acid, and marries the doll
Three years later he leaves her for another doll

A man hands his son a brick and says, "Son, throw this brick
Through the greenhouse next door", the boy does
The boy next door throws one back, it hits the man on the head
And mortally wounds him, "Ah well", he says
As his lifeblood trickles away, "Boys will be boys"

A thoughtful woman sends her best friend a parcel inside, it says
'It's a free sample', full body beauty treatment but it really contains
Acids and chemicals, when her friend tries it, her hair falls out
Her face is wrinkled and her body scarred, thoughtful woman turns
To her husband and winks, and says, "Pre-emptive strike"

Psycho street, friendly people down on psycho street
Good neighbors down on psycho street
If you need a hand, need a friend, we understand
And if you need a pal, we'll be there, any how

Psycho street
Psycho street
Psycho street
...