Ray Stevens Lyrics
"The Hustler"

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It was a cool night in Dallas at the Southside 9 Ball Palace
When I stepped in off the sidewalk with my pool cue in my hand
I said "I've come for Texas Slim, we're gonna shoot 9 ball, me and him"
And tonight we'll find out who is the better man
Now I've heard he used to be the best and I've already beaten all the rest
From New York to Chicago and L.A.
They say that he's the king of hustlers
An old time Texas pool hall rustler and ain't he the man that they used to say

Never make it too easy when you break 'em
Get all the money out on the table then take time to chalk and aim
Don't take pity on the suckers son... Just take 'em
'Cause if you can't afford to lose
Then you should never play the game

Then out of the shadows dim stepped what once was Texas Slim
He was ripped, worn and ragged, kinda run down at the feel
He said, "It's been a long time son, since I shot pool with anyone
But I'll play you one game if that's the way you feel"
He was a pitiful looking man with a three day beard and a tremblin' hand
Had to take him a shot of whiskey to ease the shakes
I said, "I've come to take you for all you've got
And it don't matter if it ain't a lot
And just to show you I'm a sportin' man, you can have the break"

And then a smile crossed the face of every pool shark in that place
As Slim took down his custom inlaid pool cue from its stand
He said "I've heard for days that you were comin'
With your pockets full and your young mouth runnin'
And tonight we'll find out who is the better man"
Then all we heard were cue balls crack and 9 balls fall and Slim say "Rack"
He kept the run 'til all my money was gone
And then he looked at me with those eye of ice
And said, "Son I'll just leave you with this advice
To ponder as you hitchhike your way back home"

Never make it too easy when you break 'em
Get all the money out on the table then take time to chalk and aim
Don't take pity on the suckers son... just take 'em
'Cause if you can't afford to lose
Then you should never play the game
This song is from the album "Osama-Yo' Mama: The Album", "Ear Candy" and "Box Set".