album: Monty Python Sings (1991)
genre:

Send "Every Sperm Is Sacred" Ringtone to Cell

DAD: 
There are Jews in the world. 
There are Buddhists. 
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then 
There are those that follow Mohammed, but 
I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic, 
And have been since before I was born, 
And the one thing they say about Catholics is: 
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six-footer. 
You don't have to have a great brain. 
You don't have to have any clothes on. You're 
A Catholic the moment Dad came,

Because

Every sperm is sacred. 
Every sperm is great. 
If a sperm is wasted, 
God gets quite irate.

CHILDREN: 
Every sperm is sacred. 
Every sperm is great. 
If a sperm is wasted, 
God gets quite irate.

GIRL: 
Let the heathen spill theirs 
On the dusty ground. 
God shall make them pay for 
Each sperm that can't be found.

CHILDREN: 
Every sperm is wanted. 
Every sperm is good. 
Every sperm is needed 
In your neighbourhood.

MUM: 
Hindu, Taoist, Mormon, 
Spill theirs just anywhere, 
But God loves those who treat their 
Semen with more care.

MEN: 
Every sperm is sacred. 
Every sperm is great. 
WOMEN: 
If a sperm is wasted,... 
CHILDREN: 
...God get quite irate.

PRIEST: 
Every sperm is sacred. 
BRIDE and GROOM: 
Every sperm is good. 
NANNIES: 
Every sperm is needed... 
CARDINALS: 
...In your neighbourhood!

CHILDREN: 
Every sperm is useful. 
Every sperm is fine. 
FUNERAL CORTEGE: 
God needs everybody's. 
MOURNER #1: 
Mine! 
MOURNER #2: 
And mine! 
CORPSE: 
And mine!

NUN: 
Let the Pagan spill theirs 
O'er mountain, hill, and plain. 
HOLY STATUES: 
God shall strike them down for 
Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

EVERYONE: 
Every sperm is sacred. 
Every sperm is good. 
Every sperm is needed 
In your neighbourhood.

Send "Every Sperm Is Sacred" Ringtone to Cell